Ive got countless dreams
But I think I’ve put them in a wrong place
So now, they are scattred
Each day I take a chance to fix it up
Almost give up what I have
Just to put together
The pieces of broken dreams
But nothing happens
Now i surrender
Surrender
Can I still be victorious?
Now that everything disappear (disappear)
How long will I endure it?
If the world has nothing to offer
Dreaming gets harder when I know
That everything is just an imaginary
How long will it take to keep
Even I hold it tight
Even i work with it right
Still nothing happens
Dreams slippin’ away
Now I surrender
Surrender
Can I still be victorious?
Now that everything disappear (disappear)
How long will I endure it?
if the world has nothing to offer
Can I still be victorious?
Now that everything disappear (disappear)
How long will I endure it?
If the world has nothing to offer
So might as well not be a dreamer
i had composed this song before when im starting to look for my first job but through out my countless application, still i wasn't abe to got the work that i wanted. i hope i could clearly record this soon.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Convoluted truth of a thinking being
“If you want to live for luxury, work in profit-oriented company. If you want to live for significance, work to the other side.” – Katherine Macabia
Thoughts I’ve come up from the job I have work with for a month and a half. Some people would look up at me because I do have the work to earn money. Yet in my case, never did I become tranquil with the manner of the job. Never did I scream from the crowd that “im working in a “there” ”. Why? Because never did I become proud of it! And never did I learn to love it. That’s a fact.
Working “there” is a daily struggle. Im waking up in a condition of commotion and upheavals. From time to time, my convictions are scuffling with the sort of work. As I entered the diminutive room from a glass door and sit in front of the company’s laptop will already mean for my skirmish. More than eight hours that SHOULD settle from this chair. Plainly desk work.
Every time i walk along my home, I constantly am asking myself, “IS THERE ANY CHANGES THAT I MADE IN THIS WORLD?” Then I would look back from the things I did through out the day. Sad to say, everyday I would only give my self an answer of NOTHING. So there’s a problem and I am the one to blame. I preferred to isolate and drain myself in “there” as if im tolerating a mistake than doing something more significant things. I am meant to live for so much more and I lost myself. So what better thing to do is to get out of this place while I still have time. I want to be back from my consciousness. I just don’t want to earn monetarily but as well as intangible compensation that would build up my realization for my existence.
Now that I’ve got my freedom from “there”, i will exercise what is relevant that would recuperate the damage humanity.
Thoughts I’ve come up from the job I have work with for a month and a half. Some people would look up at me because I do have the work to earn money. Yet in my case, never did I become tranquil with the manner of the job. Never did I scream from the crowd that “im working in a “there” ”. Why? Because never did I become proud of it! And never did I learn to love it. That’s a fact.
Working “there” is a daily struggle. Im waking up in a condition of commotion and upheavals. From time to time, my convictions are scuffling with the sort of work. As I entered the diminutive room from a glass door and sit in front of the company’s laptop will already mean for my skirmish. More than eight hours that SHOULD settle from this chair. Plainly desk work.
Every time i walk along my home, I constantly am asking myself, “IS THERE ANY CHANGES THAT I MADE IN THIS WORLD?” Then I would look back from the things I did through out the day. Sad to say, everyday I would only give my self an answer of NOTHING. So there’s a problem and I am the one to blame. I preferred to isolate and drain myself in “there” as if im tolerating a mistake than doing something more significant things. I am meant to live for so much more and I lost myself. So what better thing to do is to get out of this place while I still have time. I want to be back from my consciousness. I just don’t want to earn monetarily but as well as intangible compensation that would build up my realization for my existence.
Now that I’ve got my freedom from “there”, i will exercise what is relevant that would recuperate the damage humanity.
the power of an impuissant
Friday, August 8, 2008
i may be too CONFUSED with my everyday decisions
but i am CERTAIN that... 
thank you LORD :D
thank you LORD :D
Thoughts from daily resistance
Friday, August 1, 2008
Yesterday was turmoil of thoughts
The situation is getting more twisted from work-related issues
Today I’m standing in the cold rain
Stumbling through the past
I can’t any longer return to the beginning
Finding something new on my path
I don’t want to feel indignant but I can’t
I’m always living from the struggles under the sun
Making me distorted from the prior outlook
And from my own mistakes I ruined my life
And I don't want to bear this on mind
But how will it be possible
If I am taking all the blames
Getting mad is dangerous
‘Coz I can’t move along
And walk from my desired direction
Now I’m calling you my savior
To sanitize my heart and mind
And get me out from this gloomy stride
I’m pleading to you my savior
My only rescuer
Yesterday was turmoil of thoughts
The situation is getting more twisted from work-related issues
Today I’m standing in the cold rain
Stumbling through the past
I can’t any longer return to the beginning
Finding something new on my path
I don’t want to feel indignant but I can’t
I’m always living from the struggles under the sun
Making me distorted from the prior outlook
And from my own mistakes I ruined my life
And I don't want to bear this on mind
But how will it be possible
If I am taking all the blames
Getting mad is dangerous
‘Coz I can’t move along
And walk from my desired direction
Now I’m calling you my savior
To sanitize my heart and mind
And get me out from this gloomy stride
I’m pleading to you my savior
My only rescuer
AWFUL DESTINATION
Friday, July 18, 2008
Iniquity forces whispers
In a snap it whips your being
And you’re unaware.
You lost you’re spirit
As your mind works alive
Then a requiem plays
While seeing yourself screaming
In a blazing furnace
Yet no one draw closer for rescue
You stab to open your eyes
However you failed
To see the light
Iniquity forces whispers
In a snap it whips your being
And you’re unaware.
You lost you’re spirit
As your mind works alive
Then a requiem plays
While seeing yourself screaming
In a blazing furnace
Yet no one draw closer for rescue
You stab to open your eyes
However you failed
To see the light
Sporadic Killer of Morbid-Mindset
Im apathetic sometimes its difficult admitting it
Like a whistling wind you may not see my diversity
yet at a certain point you can feel it
But ill just let your crowd to disgust me
As i scream mans immorality
and nothing can cease me
not until they have reach their awakening
Now is the perfect time to start killing the unrighteousness that everybodys taking on
not for my own sake not even only for your own good but for the approaching generation
and now i horn the truth unto you
the untold reality of your customary actions
Looking forward for positive response
as you begin to understand
yeah open your minds
purify your hearts
and be molded as one of a kind
Initially I formed this to turn into a song. Yet, as of now, I still wasn’t able to work on it. Hopefully soon.
Like a whistling wind you may not see my diversity
yet at a certain point you can feel it
But ill just let your crowd to disgust me
As i scream mans immorality
and nothing can cease me
not until they have reach their awakening
Now is the perfect time to start killing the unrighteousness that everybodys taking on
not for my own sake not even only for your own good but for the approaching generation
and now i horn the truth unto you
the untold reality of your customary actions
Looking forward for positive response
as you begin to understand
yeah open your minds
purify your hearts
and be molded as one of a kind
Initially I formed this to turn into a song. Yet, as of now, I still wasn’t able to work on it. Hopefully soon.
A fallen leaf
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
You were once a stranger from my sight while I am nobody on your side. At that instant you were too logical and I was absurd before. Affection of admiration wasn't unequivocally showed for your fame caused my shame. I fear to know what you feel towards me, so I feign. And so then, truth has been kept for a long time until you turned to be a mind's eye. We drove from two different roads and we're factually and metaphorically distant from each other. But now your presence I can feel yet its essence I can’t grasp. Is it to figure out the respond from the past query? Then live again from despair? this wouldn't happen again. Now I realized things are not the same. I can't no longer persist myself to believe from the status before. Truth will set me free yet at first it may make me miserable. So, much better to end it like this.
You were once a stranger from my sight while I am nobody on your side. At that instant you were too logical and I was absurd before. Affection of admiration wasn't unequivocally showed for your fame caused my shame. I fear to know what you feel towards me, so I feign. And so then, truth has been kept for a long time until you turned to be a mind's eye. We drove from two different roads and we're factually and metaphorically distant from each other. But now your presence I can feel yet its essence I can’t grasp. Is it to figure out the respond from the past query? Then live again from despair? this wouldn't happen again. Now I realized things are not the same. I can't no longer persist myself to believe from the status before. Truth will set me free yet at first it may make me miserable. So, much better to end it like this.
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